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H ow can 30 precisely chosen words make the difference between a life of hellish loneliness and scoring a soul mate? Some people read personal looking for humorous infotainment, others hope it will lead to the long-awaited LTR. Personals is here to help. Personals to help total strangers banish loneliness and connect them, through a few words on newsprint, with their mystery love? Personal experience, of course. When I read my first ad at age 18, I was amused and excited by the possibility of finding the girlfriend I had yet to meet in the flesh.
Not finding an ad to which I wanted to respond, I promptly placed my own. Seeking NSSF to share hiking, biking, deep conversations, strolling through autumn leaves, play and watching sunsets. Did I garden? No, unless shower mold counts.
Did I do anything creative? No, unless squandering hundreds of parental dollars at poker is creative. My first suggestion for clients is: Tell the truth. If you channel poetry from dead masters and you write it down, say so. If your only writing is s of journal whining, forget it. Next, be specific.
Unless you want every reader who understands English to contact you, aim for what you really want. My ad said I loved people, animals and nature. My loves were loves of the masses. I also neglected to state my age, or an age range for respondents. Other common examples of too-general words or phrases used in personals include: movies, outdoors, music, eating out, shopping, sports, travel, reading, etc.
More specific is better: sail boating, Phish head, Asian cuisine, shopping at Seven days vt dating stores, exploring Vermont on a Harley. Life Philosophies. The first category may be one of the most important, yet one of the hardest to articulate. I call it life-view, or philosophy of life.
In my first personal ad, the words spiritual, creative and deep conversations fell under this rubric. But Seven days vt dating could have chosen better words. The type and content of deep conversation might speak to your life-view. Note that some of the above concern political leanings and values. What will your match think about abortion, taxes, welfare, who really won the election, environmental protection or gun control? Unless both people have no interest in anything political, having different political persuasions can be a major turn off. Before I move on, just a quick mention of other words and phrases that are too vague:.
I would, though. If religion is important, enlighten the readership to your faith. Jesus lives in my TV and we love channel surfing together. In my ad I mentioned hiking and biking. Personal ad writers often describe the physical activities they enjoy or participate in, but they may also want to communicate important factoids about health, sexuality, body image, etc.
This is important. To some, it could mean seven or eight pints per day. Not much needs to be said here. Virtually everyone whose heart still beats likes and wants sex. Body image. Frankly, many people will write you off the list, but my experience suggests there are men and women out there who can look beyond physical appearance.
Hey, they may be carrying around a few extra pounds themselves. Need I say Seven days vt dating about inner versus outer beauty? Shared Interests. When it comes to activities and interests, ambiguity will get you nowhere.
Mention activities or hobbies that convey what you really like. My ad listed gardening, hiking, biking, travel, strolling through autumn leaves and watching sunsets. One reward of Personalogy is helping clients come up with more precise and revealing words to describe their interests.
If you are, determine how much. Many people placing personals are experiencing some degree of neediness or loneliness. Expressing your anger is another surefire way to keep people away in droves. Still, bitter finger-pointing will keep everyone away. And remember, when you place an ad and someone responds, you control whether they get youraddress or a date. Portray yourself more accurately with phrases like these:. Often people say what they wish they were. There it is: Personalogy. Some just go to the Humane Society and adopt. Luckily, no one responded to my first ad, as I was depressed, scarcely attempting to enjoy life, and craving the happiness of a female savior.
I leave for India tomorrow with begging bowl in hand. Just Seven days vt dating. Actually, I met the first love of my life through the personals five years ago. I hope my little discourse will help you, too. Comments are closed. SinceSeven Days has allowed readers to comment on all stories posted on our website.
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The Personals Touch